Friday, March 16, 2007

Sweat Shops right here in America..

Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt will be announcing a new clothing line that will be affordable thanks to new production tactics. The line will include accessories that often times look like other expensive brands but last half as long and smell like tomato soup.

This was announced after a recent visit to Vietnam where Angelina hand picked a new employee...son.

An anonymous source indicates that Brad and Angelina have now accumulated enough children to have built a new mansion in only 4 days. The source indicates OSHA was not allowed on the premises and that Brad and Angelina will be needing to replace several fallen children during the construction.

Chow Yon Sing Ling Pao Fun states "They take baby." We couldn't understand the rest of the shit he said so will assume it has something to do with rice and Kia.

Angelina and Brad make quite a scene in their "Humanitarian Efforts" however the new mansion is completely open on the inside with no private rooms and full of manufacturing equipment. Sources also indicate a private burial pit on the property. "They had poor little what's his face dig it all by his self. He was like 6. But I got to tell you, that little sum a bitch can fling dirt; well could fling dirt."

At having nearly 15 children the couple insists they love children. So does Hannibal Lector, with the right sauce and a good wine.

Brad and Angelina's line of clothing will be released this fall with new and exciting patterns stolen from other designers. "We feel fashion shouldn't hurt." The couple stated at the last press release. "Shouldn't hurt who?" a source close to the couple stated. "I've been at their residence. They have a new Olympic swimming pool in the back. Thats what they made the children do when they were punished. It's not like a normal kid getting punished; they punished poor little Hop Sing for over a week and she worked for a week straight before she fell from exhaustion and had to be taken to the hospital."

Well for the fashionistas in us there is a new line coming out that anyone can afford. This source hears that the line will rival D&G, DK, and Gucci. I personally can't wait to get my hands on a new man bag made by some little uneducated third world child in the comfort of sweat shop in California, run by illegal immigrants from Mexico. I say Brad and Angelina need to adopt more employees, I mean children, so they can push more knock offs out even faster.

God Bless America and third world countries where you can buy children from impoverished parents and use them for whatever means you want.

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